


on the subject of hats

by sakura_freefall



Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Cosette is the only smart person in the entire story, Cosette's POV, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, F/M, Gen, Ghosts, Grantaire being Grantaire, M/M, Marius catches Enjolras calling Grantaire a pet name, Marius is a sad and confused noodle, More just stupid, Not really angsty tho, Weddings, among other things, and Enjolras gets very flustered, canon compliant character death, honestly, to the point where it's just comedic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-25
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:02:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,354
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27706667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sakura_freefall/pseuds/sakura_freefall
Summary: Marius misses his friends on his wedding day, and Grantaire comforts him in perhaps the most obnoxious way imaginable. Cosette is proven wrong about something she'd forgotten she said, and Enjolras... well, Enjolras wants to keep Grantaire away from the champagne.Or, how ghosts can (and do) wear round hats.
Relationships: Cosette Fauchelevent/Marius Pontmercy, Enjolras/Grantaire (Les Misérables), Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Kudos: 40





	on the subject of hats

**Author's Note:**

> A while back I had the headcanon that, remembering Cosette's arbitrary line about how ghosts don't wear round hats, the obvious conclusion would be Grantaire wearing a round hat to Cosette's wedding, just to screw with her mind.
> 
> Ergo, this happened.

The early-spring sunlight shone through the window of the Gillenormand house like liquid pearls. A single songbird chirped from atop the fencepost. It was the sort of day on which the universe had aligned itself perfectly and flawlessly for the purpose of happiness.

Cosette blinked her eyes open, yawning, and pushed her blonde curls out of her face. Today was the long-awaited day, the day on which she was getting married to her Marius. Her only regret was that her father had declined her invitation, but one could not have everything, of course. She knew that this day held sadness as well as happiness for her fiance, who was still battling the effects that last June had had on his psyche. He had lost all his friends that day, and still sometimes he walked the streets, talking animatedly to himself. She had never known any of them personally- she'd only ever met the girl, Eponine, and they hadn't spoken for many years, so she was saddened to hear of her death, but not consumed by grief. Marius had told her stories, though, about all of them, and she listened patiently, knowing that perhaps it would help him.

"Marius!" she called down the hallway. "Do you expect me to button my dress on my own? Does it look like I have four arms?"

"Coming, love," he replied, appearing in the doorway with a crooked cravat and mussed hair, and faintly red eyes.

"Marius, oh dear," Cosette murmured. "You- you have been crying?"

"Do- do not worry about me, Cosette. I am happy! I am happy for you, and for us!"

"You're a terrible liar, Marius Pontmercy."

He sighed, defeated, and sat down at the foot of the bed, a gesture which would probably have made his grandfather throw a fit. "I just... I always thought they'd be here. At least Courfeyrac. And Eponine."

"Oh, Marius," said Cosette, kissing the top of his curls. "I know. I'm sure they're here, watching you."

"But... I can't see them! I want them here, really here!"

"I understand, Marius. But would they want you crying on your wedding day?"

"No, I sup- I suppose not," he replied, before adding "but what- what do I have to lose?"

"Nothing, my dear. Simply try, for me, alright? My love, that cake isn't going to eat itself!"

"I suppose you are right, as usual, Cosette," he said, managing to smile.

"Now I suppose you will help me button my dress?"

\----------------

The wedding was held at the church, as per tradition. The sun was shining, the sky was clear, and a light dew had settled on the grass. Marius and Cosette entered hand in hand, as they walked down the aisle. A surprising number of people had attended the wedding, their colorful dresses and hats looking especially bright when contrasted to Marius's dark suit and Cosette's white bridal gown.

The priest began to pronounce the vows, as the happy couple promised to love and cherish and never abandon each other. "Do you, Marius Pontmercy, take Euphraise Fauchelevent to be your lawfully wedded wife?"

"I do," croaked Marius, voice shaking.

"And do you, Euphraise Fauchelevent, take Marius Pontmercy to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

"I do," she said, beaming.

"Then I declare you husband and wife! You may kiss the bride!" Marius's lips met Cosette's in a passionate kiss, both flushed with happiness and love. Marius finally pulled away, tears gathering in his eyes.

The guests began to migrate to the side room to dance and enjoy refreshments. Cosette was pulling Marius there herself when suddenly the man pointed a shaking finger at the other end of the room.

"Cosette! Cosette, over there!"

"Where, love?"

He turned around, pulling her towards the empty cathedral corner. "Over here! Don't you see?"

"See what?"

"Him!"

"Who?"

"Him! It's him! Gran- Grantaire!"

"Marius..." murmured Cosette, concern evident in her face. "It's not... perhaps it was a relative... Grantaire is gone, remember?"

"You said! You said they'd be here, and you were right!"

"Marius-"

He continued, a kind of restless fervor in his eyes. "Don't you see him? In the green vest and outrageous hat?" Cosette squinted her eyes in the direction of Marius's finger, and indeed saw a man, short and dark-haired, wearing a green coat, with an almost ridiculously large round-brimmed hat. The strangest thing, however, was that the man seemed almost... fuzzy, like a whisp of colored smoke that could blow away any second.

"Come on, let's talk to him!"

"Marius, I-"

"Cosette!"

"Marius, I see him too, but..."

"Don't you think I'd know my own friend if I saw him? Even if it is a ghost?"

"Yes, but-"

"Please, Cosette..." He looked up at her with such tenderness that she couldn't resist.

"Fine," she relented. What was the worst that could happen?

Marius pulled her over to the man, who looked stranger and stranger every step she took. The man smiled, a wide smirk as he cocked his head, surveying the couple."

"Grantaire? Is- is that you?"

"No," he replied dryly. "It's King Louis. Of course it's me."

"Grantaire, I missed you!" Marius cried as he reached to embrace the other boy.

"Wait, hey! I'm not-" he cried, as Marius fell through him. Cosette managed to catch him before he hit the floor, thankfully. His concussion had only just healed, and it would not be beneficial to have it happen again.

"What... what is with your hat?" asked Marius, slightly confusedly.

"I don't think you're the one to talk, Monsieur Walks-Around-In-A-Green-Coat-Pretending-It's-Black," he retorted. "But if you must know, it's-" he stifled back a laugh- "It's because of your madamoiselle- well, now madam!"

"Why?" asked Cosette confusedly.

"Well, I heard a story about-" he sputtered a laugh- "About you, when you met Pontmercy. You- you said he- he could not be a ghost, because- because ghosts don't wear round hats!" he wheezed.

"So?"

"Well, here I am," the man laughed, "Wearing a very round hat!"

Cosette shook her head. "You came all the way here... to prove that ghosts wore round hats?"

"Obviously," he laughed. "I was very proud of myself for coming up with that, if I do say so myself. I do want to say congratulations, on your marriage and all, of course, we're all glad that you two found each other," he said, speaking in a theatric tone. "In fact, I myself-"

"Grantaire," spoke another voice, and Marius did a double-take to see several other forms, the most prominent being a blonde, red-vested man, taking shape around them. "Grantaire, what- what are you doing with that hat?"

"Hello, Apollo," he smirked. "I came to prove someone wrong."

"And who might that be?"

"Pontmercy's girl, Euphraise Cosette, who said that ghosts did not wear round hats. Evidently, this is a falsehood, as I am wearing a very, very round hat."

"Yes. Yes, _amour,_ you are. Now come along, I told Combeferre I'd keep you away from the champagne, and I aim to keep that promise."

"Wait, did you call him-"

"Quiet, Bonapartist," Enjolras commanded, and Marius stopped talking with a gulp, relaxing only when the other man's face melted into a relaxed smile. "What I refer to R here is not your buisiness."

"So all this time, when you said you only loved your country, you were really-"

"I said quiet!" sighed Enjolras pointedly. "Congratulations, really. I mean this sincerely," he said evenly.

"Thank you," squeaked Marius, looking like a child finally recieving approval from an admired parent.

"We- we'd best be going. We'll see you again, I'm sure of it, Courfeyrac would never abandon you, and we'd never abandon him."

"I miss you!" Marius called at the fading figures. "I'm sorry!" He started sniffling again.

"Nothing to be sorry for," yelled someone- familliar sounding, the girl perhaps. "We miss you too!"

Marius looked at Cosette, and Cosette looked at Marius.

"Well," said the woman conversationally. "I suppose I was wrong. Ghosts do wear round hats after all."

"Indeed they do," replied Marius. "Now I have a mind to enjoy that cake you ordered," he finished, as the couple walked into the sunshine.


End file.
